I can hear you thinking right now… who is this pig and how did he get so Italic? I’ve been thinking the same thing myself all week. Here’s my story…
My name is Kevin. About a decade ago, I was but a lowly freelancer working in New York City for the Sci-Fi Channel website (I know, right? Still think about how cool that was), and I was asked to knock together a handful of ideas for beefing up cutting edge web content. I put together three amazing pitches. Then I left New York City before they ever saw the light of day.
One of these pitches* was called Schrödinger’s Cat, a simple story about a scrawny lab cat owned by a crazed quantum physicist, shoved into a radioactive box which imbued him with enhanced superhero-like abilities to thwart crime and serve justice in the, er, in the afterlife. There, I said it. Don’t be upset if you got lost in there somewhere; I still can’t boil it down to a proper sentence.
The cat lay dormant in the back of my mind for several years, until I got the opportunity to pitch the idea to Straandlooper on the heels of working on Lifeboat Luke. There, I toyed around with it as an episodic cartoon series, a serial web series, a feature, a TV special, this, that, the other thing. At the same time, Dean Burke and I were working on a little known iPhone app called Hector: Badge of Carnage … (waits for cheers, hears none, coughs awkwardly and continues) … which went on to become the Funniest Game Ever Made. Eh? Oh sorry: Funniest Game I’VE Ever Made.
So Dean and I started to wonder: what about Schrödinger’s Cat The Game? Action packed, crazy subject matter, cute yet dark, cool yet irreverent. And off we went.
We cooked up such an unbelievably kickass story that we had trouble understanding it ourselves. It touched upon just about every little nugget of popular science, physics, astronomy, mathematics, matter, light, time, gravity, paranormal phenomena, entanglement, all wrapped up in a package so humongous that the pitch needed to be placed on an oak table and required two hands to open the cover. It was, and still is, super awesome.
Admittedly, it was also the sort of thing that would have taken a budget of eighty zillion dollars and an infinite number of coder-monkeys to actually make happen, but that didn’t make it any less super-awesome. In fact, that was part of its charm. Saying that, though it saddened me to do so, I also put together a still-super-awesome-yet-now-kind-of-achievable pitch.
Fast forward to this week. Word on the street is: someone somewhere is interested in the Schrödinger’s Cat project. The good news: I would need to start up my own company to make it happen, of which I would be the company Director, and that I would have complete creative control to make exactly the game I’d always wanted to make. There was no bad news.
And that, friends, is how Italic Pig came into being. Exactly what an italic pig has to do with Schrödinger’s Cat I don’t know, but it’s easier to spell. I’ve now got a few months to prove that I can assemble a team, create a budget and organise a schedule for game that bridges the canyon between the game in my head and the cash that may soon fall into my hand.
If this all gets funded, I think the first thing I’ll do is ask for a withdrawal of the entire budget to be delivered to my house in 10p coins so I can roll around in it like Scrooge freakin’ McDuck. Wouldn’t you? I’ll leave that out of the pitch though.
The cat lives! He LIVES! BWA HA HA HAAAAA!
*If you’re wondering what happened to the other two pitches, I’ve since turned one into a hilarious and quirky YA novel which I can proudly say has spent several minutes in the hands of several literary agency interns before being tossed in their esteemed bins. The hunt continues, but if anyone is interested in reading it on my reputation alone, I may just offer a limited edition self-print to the eager and the worthy. The other pitch is still on slow boil, but will one day earn me an Academy Award, you mark my words.